Shalom??
...Shaloooom????
Is anybody there?....SHAAAALOOOOM?!
Nine Years Later...
14 years ago
Monday, December 28, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
***ChristmasSleepover?***
***So I (and others) think that it would be a grand idea to have a sleepover thingy thing after the fallstar sweater party shindig on friday.***
SOOOO let me know what you think.
Kaite B., idk if you're able to, but i hope sooo!!
madisonrochelletopper
SOOOO let me know what you think.
Kaite B., idk if you're able to, but i hope sooo!!
madisonrochelletopper
Friday, December 11, 2009
wait...what?!
my grades for the quarter were posted....
i got:
A in sign language
A in biology lab
B- in biology lecture!!(the really hard class)
B+ in trig!!
i was soooo surprised and sooo stinkin happy!! i seriously have no idea how i got a B- in biology! only by Jesus!! thank you so much for all the prayers :)
wowyyyy i'm blown away!!!!!! :D :D
mmmmmmmmadison
i got:
A in sign language
A in biology lab
B- in biology lecture!!(the really hard class)
B+ in trig!!
i was soooo surprised and sooo stinkin happy!! i seriously have no idea how i got a B- in biology! only by Jesus!! thank you so much for all the prayers :)
wowyyyy i'm blown away!!!!!! :D :D
mmmmmmmmadison
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Oh Relief, I missed you.
I am officially DONE with fall quarter!!! thank you Lord!
I still haven't gotten my grades back, but I'm feeling good about it. whatever i get, i get. so whateva.
It's so weird when you finish something...i remember back before this quarter started. what was it...3 months ago?
before i do something big, go somewhere, or start something new i always think about how i feel at the moment, try to imagine what might happen in the days, weeks, months to come, and how i'm going to end up at the end. idk if any of you do the same. it's so weird being at the other end of the 3 months. what did i even really accomplish?
hmmm
so going into this school year was right after i got back from Europe. during that trip for some reason i really felt God preparing me for a hard/crazy/crappy next couple months. i wasn't exactly sure what He ment by that, but as i lived my life these few months, He was totally right.
i know you pretty much know what's happened. not all of it obviously, but the big stuff. it all started with Heather moving away, a friend i had grown so close to that it felt like i was saying goodbye to a twin sister. it sucked. i felt really alone...even at church and in small group. we had made so many plans together on what our last year of high school together was going to be like, not realizing that we were already living it. following that, bernice left, my friend hilary went to africa, i rarely got to see my other close friend olivia, the people i thought would be there for me kind of weren't (and don't worry, i'm not meaning you girlies). but during this God opened my eyes to how much i rely on other people and the security they give me. the way that i can shadow them, or hide behing them. the way that i use them to speak for me because i don't want to put myself out there. and it's still a struggle for me because that's kind of how God made me, but i know He was growing me and stretching me...putting me in foreign and uncomfortable situations to reveal more of who He is. He needs to be who i shadow, who i hide behind, who speaks for me.
and during all of this i kept remembering that i knew this was going to happen. i knew this part of my life was going to be hard becaue God told me it would be. but it was still hard to trust Him. it was still hard to go to Him with stuff because i didn't know what to say. all i could say was...help.
and He's showing me that that's all i need to do.
Proverbs 3:5-6
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct[a] your paths.
what else has happened?
i got a car. i got a job. i turned 18. that in itself is unbelievable to me. i know it's still so young, but when i was younger i always would picture what it would be like to be 18. what i would know, who i would hang out with, what i would do with my life. i feel like i know nothing and i have no idea what i'm doing with my life after this year. but i guess that's the exciting part of it all, huh? ;)
i don't know where i'm going with this or why i'm even posting this. haha i've just been in a thinking mood the past couple days.
anyway, another thing God layed on my heart during the Europe trip was how He wanted me to be more of a leader. and i knew He wanted me to start a Bible study, but i didn't, and still don't, really know what He meant by that. i was honestly really nervous about it. Heather was going to help me, but obviously she moved so my security was once again pulled away. something we learned on the mission trip was that ministry requires vulnerability. Tanner kept bugging me about that and always asked me when i was going to start a bible study. it was nice to finally have someone challenging me instead of me always pushing other people, you know?
well the study is up and running...i'm not sure how to handle it, but i'm praying that i will be senstive to His spirit and what He wants to speak to me and the girls.
so i still don't know where i'm going with this.
basically, september through now has been extremely weird. there were so many times when i felt alone, when i felt like i wanted to cry but for some reason my body doesn't physically know how (haha), when i felt peaceful, content, uncomfortable, confused. i know it's all part of life. and i thank God for what He's taught me and how i learned it even thought it's been hard.
right now i feel relieved. and oh, how've i've missed that feeling.
Ecclesiastes 3
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What does the worker gain from his toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on men. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. 13 That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.
22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work, because that is his lot. For who can bring him to see what will happen after him?
Madison.
I still haven't gotten my grades back, but I'm feeling good about it. whatever i get, i get. so whateva.
It's so weird when you finish something...i remember back before this quarter started. what was it...3 months ago?
before i do something big, go somewhere, or start something new i always think about how i feel at the moment, try to imagine what might happen in the days, weeks, months to come, and how i'm going to end up at the end. idk if any of you do the same. it's so weird being at the other end of the 3 months. what did i even really accomplish?
hmmm
so going into this school year was right after i got back from Europe. during that trip for some reason i really felt God preparing me for a hard/crazy/crappy next couple months. i wasn't exactly sure what He ment by that, but as i lived my life these few months, He was totally right.
i know you pretty much know what's happened. not all of it obviously, but the big stuff. it all started with Heather moving away, a friend i had grown so close to that it felt like i was saying goodbye to a twin sister. it sucked. i felt really alone...even at church and in small group. we had made so many plans together on what our last year of high school together was going to be like, not realizing that we were already living it. following that, bernice left, my friend hilary went to africa, i rarely got to see my other close friend olivia, the people i thought would be there for me kind of weren't (and don't worry, i'm not meaning you girlies). but during this God opened my eyes to how much i rely on other people and the security they give me. the way that i can shadow them, or hide behing them. the way that i use them to speak for me because i don't want to put myself out there. and it's still a struggle for me because that's kind of how God made me, but i know He was growing me and stretching me...putting me in foreign and uncomfortable situations to reveal more of who He is. He needs to be who i shadow, who i hide behind, who speaks for me.
and during all of this i kept remembering that i knew this was going to happen. i knew this part of my life was going to be hard becaue God told me it would be. but it was still hard to trust Him. it was still hard to go to Him with stuff because i didn't know what to say. all i could say was...help.
and He's showing me that that's all i need to do.
Proverbs 3:5-6
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct[a] your paths.
what else has happened?
i got a car. i got a job. i turned 18. that in itself is unbelievable to me. i know it's still so young, but when i was younger i always would picture what it would be like to be 18. what i would know, who i would hang out with, what i would do with my life. i feel like i know nothing and i have no idea what i'm doing with my life after this year. but i guess that's the exciting part of it all, huh? ;)
i don't know where i'm going with this or why i'm even posting this. haha i've just been in a thinking mood the past couple days.
anyway, another thing God layed on my heart during the Europe trip was how He wanted me to be more of a leader. and i knew He wanted me to start a Bible study, but i didn't, and still don't, really know what He meant by that. i was honestly really nervous about it. Heather was going to help me, but obviously she moved so my security was once again pulled away. something we learned on the mission trip was that ministry requires vulnerability. Tanner kept bugging me about that and always asked me when i was going to start a bible study. it was nice to finally have someone challenging me instead of me always pushing other people, you know?
well the study is up and running...i'm not sure how to handle it, but i'm praying that i will be senstive to His spirit and what He wants to speak to me and the girls.
so i still don't know where i'm going with this.
basically, september through now has been extremely weird. there were so many times when i felt alone, when i felt like i wanted to cry but for some reason my body doesn't physically know how (haha), when i felt peaceful, content, uncomfortable, confused. i know it's all part of life. and i thank God for what He's taught me and how i learned it even thought it's been hard.
right now i feel relieved. and oh, how've i've missed that feeling.
Ecclesiastes 3
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What does the worker gain from his toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on men. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. 13 That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him.
22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work, because that is his lot. For who can bring him to see what will happen after him?
Madison.
Monday, December 7, 2009
bonding.
i was laughing and kinda like joking around a lil with my dads gf....it was weiirrrddd.....but good. the end.
-natska
-natska
Friday, December 4, 2009
life is like a bowl of soup
soo im slowly but surely opening up (at home) and its..hmmm kool? i guess hah. ive just been having more of a positive outlook on things and not taking things so personally and just being to so "ugghhhhhh!" about things and when people talk to me. (at thy home) and like im just more positive these days haha thats all i can say about that really. i helped make zupa tescana with muh dads gf...werd. never in a million yeees would i have thought i would help her fold clothes. let them vaacuum my room just cuz. aaand oor even talk to her.hah...*actually in a million years i think that possibly would happen) buuut anywho. uhm. God is good and softening and opening up my heart for life its self as i know it ;) <3 yallllss haha
-natska ;)
-natska ;)
read in a british accent
Let the godly ones exult in glory; let them sing for joy.
psalm 149:5
He will redeem my soul in peace from the battle which is against me.
psalm 55:18
It does not depend on the man who wills or the man who runs, but on God who has mercy. romans 9:16
He has satisfied the thirsty soul, and the hungry soul he has filled with what is good. psalm 107:9
kQQQQQQQQQQQ?
i miss everyone. i know im crazy. and weird. but i still have the hope of growing out of it right? i shall cling to that thread of light........oh boy i must go......
psalm 149:5
He will redeem my soul in peace from the battle which is against me.
psalm 55:18
It does not depend on the man who wills or the man who runs, but on God who has mercy. romans 9:16
He has satisfied the thirsty soul, and the hungry soul he has filled with what is good. psalm 107:9
kQQQQQQQQQQQ?
i miss everyone. i know im crazy. and weird. but i still have the hope of growing out of it right? i shall cling to that thread of light........oh boy i must go......
Thursday, December 3, 2009
again
sooo i know i always talk about school on here...buuuuuut it's almost over!! praise God!!
but that means finals.
so here's the deal.
i have 2 exam's tomorrow (which i need to hardcore study for [rhyme] today) and then i have 2 final's on monday. and they are my hardest classes on the same day. but it gets better:
on monday for my biology class (which i hope i even pass) i have an exam and final back to back! which is crazy. yuck. then a trig final after that. :/
aahhhhh i'm starting to stress about it all but God keeps reminding me to "trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understading"
but the crazy/cool thing is that i feel so much happier than i did earlier in the school year when everything was going downhill. God has been giving me His joy, and when i'm walking between classes or even when i'm at work i'll hum a worship song, pray, whatever, and my mood is totally better.
i've been working on keeping in mind that in whatever i do (school, even getting bad grades, serving picky old people) i want to praise jesus and it kinda helps put things into perspective.
like...
what really matters anyway? what is going to further the kingdom of God and bring glory to him?
i don't think doing bad in one class is going to really matter. i was talking to my friend about this and she was telling me that God doesn't care at all about grades and stuff, He's going to look at my heart towards it. am i trying my best? or am i slacking off... you know? i don't know if this makes sense lol
and at work. who cares if a table of oldies has to wait a little longer for their food, or if i mess up an order. am i showing the love of Jesus to my coworkers? to my supervisor? to the people i'm serving?
hmmmm idk
i need to go study my brains out.
PRAY PRAY PRAY for me
100%Topper
but that means finals.
so here's the deal.
i have 2 exam's tomorrow (which i need to hardcore study for [rhyme] today) and then i have 2 final's on monday. and they are my hardest classes on the same day. but it gets better:
on monday for my biology class (which i hope i even pass) i have an exam and final back to back! which is crazy. yuck. then a trig final after that. :/
aahhhhh i'm starting to stress about it all but God keeps reminding me to "trust in the lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understading"
but the crazy/cool thing is that i feel so much happier than i did earlier in the school year when everything was going downhill. God has been giving me His joy, and when i'm walking between classes or even when i'm at work i'll hum a worship song, pray, whatever, and my mood is totally better.
i've been working on keeping in mind that in whatever i do (school, even getting bad grades, serving picky old people) i want to praise jesus and it kinda helps put things into perspective.
like...
what really matters anyway? what is going to further the kingdom of God and bring glory to him?
i don't think doing bad in one class is going to really matter. i was talking to my friend about this and she was telling me that God doesn't care at all about grades and stuff, He's going to look at my heart towards it. am i trying my best? or am i slacking off... you know? i don't know if this makes sense lol
and at work. who cares if a table of oldies has to wait a little longer for their food, or if i mess up an order. am i showing the love of Jesus to my coworkers? to my supervisor? to the people i'm serving?
hmmmm idk
i need to go study my brains out.
PRAY PRAY PRAY for me
100%Topper
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
k im weird.
definite good night tonight...sorry katie b i was all ehhh emotional. but uhh. i had to get it out some how right? bahaha :S oh dear. but uh worship was SOO GOOD. even had a little convo with james about it on facebook a few minutes ago hahaha anywhoo. uhm. i was in the car with my dad and i just wanted to rip him apart and say WHYYY DO THE HEAVENS DENY ME?!!! (i hate the wind its so loud and scary ;(((( ) and then he turned down the radio, cuz i turned it up so it wouldnt be so awkward in the car ride home haha and we just start like choosing names and making stoopid jokes about names and stuff in the car..like total bondage time with him...-soo weird- but it was cool cuz i thought he would be mad for some dumb reason. but total opposite day i guess lol and uhh like i was thinking about forest as a baby name for my sis haha..(JUSTTT thinking it) cuz a kid in one of my classes is named forest. and i was like "hey, what about forest haha" and freakin my DAD.....romo of all romo!more like european of all europe....eans haha he has the neeeeerrrv to tell me..while hes driving.."RUN FOREST RUN"! i laughed so bad i was like...who are yu!!?!?!!?!? HOW DO YU EVEN NO WHAT THAT MEANS?!? haha and ever since then it was just a funny good..pretty happy night i guess so far...which is a bit unusual. thank yu jesus! just wanted to share this. b/c its kinda nice to come home happy for one yu know?....and we were listening to christmas music..uhhhh i think i might have enjoyed it ALITTLE BIT! but shhhhh! dont tell anyone! =o...lol ;)
-nata (grinch)
-nata (grinch)
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